Thursday, May 11, 2017

Diary of a Noob Indie Game Dev 02: The Fires of Procrastination


Behold, the land of procrastination! One of the hardest things to overcome when I should be working on something. The many pitfalls and various black holes of the internet might be considered a wonderful place to gather inspiration from; but it can easily become the bane of productivity. How does one find their way back? How does one put themselves back on the path of a hard working individual? What tips can I give you to get you back on track and creating those assets or fixing another bug in the code?

Well, I could be answering these questions for you, but since I'm procrastinating; I've decided that I'm going to share some of the best laid out plans of how to procrastinate to your fullest potential. So please pay attention, or not. That's up to you and whatever skill level you're at when it comes to procrastinating. I think I'm way past pro-level at this point.

1. Find whatever social media site you frequent and look at absolutely everything. It doesn't matter if you care about it, just read it all and soak it in like a mindless drone. All the bad memes, all the amazing pictures of people you know (and don't know) in front of mirrors or eating, look at all the bad cat videos your friends or family post, and if you feel like you want to put a little more effort in go ahead and vote up a few random crappy things you don't give a shit about.

2. Watch Youtube videos until it's too late to return from "That Part of Youtube I Shouldn't Be On Land," It doesn't matter what you watch; it could be Benny Lava because you haven't seen it in years, or some guy with green hair shouting about how scared he is while he makes you watch him play Outlast. If you feel extra bored, go ahead and leave a cruddy comment that starts an argument about cheese and how it relates to a video on the Illuminati checkerboard theory.

3. Go to Twitter. Scroll down fast then back up again. Read the first few posts and then scroll really fast again until you find a funny gif or video in between all the garbage ads, screaming children, and optimistic quotes. Again, if you are bored enough, leave some kind of enigmatic quote and re-tweet something funny. Works every time.

4. Contemplate the sky and how fascinating it would be if you were a popsicle melting on the sidewalk as the sun sucks your life away; screaming inside as the heat melts your sweet sugary juices from the one stick which holds you afloat to this mortal coil. Each second you sit there and think about being put back into the freezer, take a sip of your cup of coffee or tea.

5. Make a crappy blog post about procrastinating and barely edit it.

Hope this helps!

Oh and a bonus one for those that are working on a game or in the studio: 

6. Load up an indie game and play that one instead of actually working on yours. A++.

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